Monthly Archives: September 2017

Daily Ramblings, Leadership

Actually, I can

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actually, I can

Can I have two Mondays and enjoy them both? Actually, I can!

A story of Time Travel and Bravery – via the Golden Gate Bridge

So I’ve started in on a ten-month Leadership programme that involves the unfortunate requirement of having to go to Sonoma, California four times.  It’s a hardship, I’m sure you can imagine.

I left Shanghai about midday on the Monday, and thanks to a rather brilliant United flight made it safely to San Francisco for about 0830 on that same Monday morning.  Confused? My head was.

My first Monday, aboard the plane, was about as nice as it can be – aboard a plane.  I ate, I drank, I slept, I read a bit.  Traveling without the three little ones in tow really is a pleasure.  I now truly get why hubby doesn’t mind all his to-ing and fro-ing.  No one gets to ask anything of me on the plane – other than whether I want beef or chicken!

My second Monday was pretty awesome too.

I picked me up a fantastic little Fiesta (can’t kick the Ford-ness out of me, no matter how you might try) and headed from the airport through San Fran and out across the Golden Gate Bridge and down in to Sausalito.  How could that drive not make you smile?

I can

When did I last get to explore on my own? To just meander around, stopping whenever and wherever I wanted?  Well, on this second chance Monday, that’s exactly what I did.

Iced coffee and cookie overlooking the city? Yes please.

Hearty singing to a truly bad playlist, whilst happily following Google Maps? Actually, I can. (With a little help from SYNC technology – sorry, couldn’t help but put that little plug in there!)

And then a night to myself in a gorgeous hotel in Napa – the River Terrace Inn.

And that’s when I decided to be brave.  (After a little power nap to head off the jet-lag snoozes.) I could have just hibernated in my room. Grabbed some room service, watched some bad TV and gone to bed early.  I was on my own after all. And I didn’t know the place at all.  But instead I decided to take myself out for dinner.  To get in the car, and drive myself 30mins up the road to head to the Auberge du Soleil for dinner.

In pre children times, hubby and I had talked about heading there for a Napa Valley vacation, but it just never happened. Other things did instead.

So I took myself there.  I got a table out on the veranda. And I sat there, with my book, surrounded by people on dates, and I felt brave and happy. And well fed!

Actually, I can!

And that kind of sums up how the rest of the week went.  I got to challenge so many of my own assumptions of what I can and cannot do.

Can I walk into a room of 20 or so strangers and tell my story of why I’m there? Actually, I can.

Can I show up and really listen to all their stories, even when uncomfortable, or heartbreaking, or both – and not try and ‘fix the problem’ but instead just listen? Actually, I can.

Can I climb a 20ft wooden pole, stand on the wobbly top and then jump off it – knowing that this group has got my back?

I can
Yep – that’s me up there. Crapping my pants!

Actually, I can.

There were a whole pile of other, smaller wins as well.

Can I sit and talk with this group of new friends about my biggest fears – without a glass of wine in my hand?

Can I dance as if nobody is watching? (Um… this one, maybe not quite so easily.  I can shuffle from leg to leg, and then slowly and gently be persuaded that with my hair and my dodgy rock loving past, I could manage a ‘rock-on’ that no one would laugh at too much!)

Can I enjoy whatever food happens to have been made that day, without getting fussy? (Um… yes, the food at Westerbeke Ranch where we were staying was unbelievably good.  I was so sad to leave it. Shanghai, you are sorely lacking right now.)

It was a great few days that put the sparkle back into the tired old (jet-lagged) eyes.

The question now is whether I can put what I’ve learned into practice in the real world?

And whether I can enjoy the next three trips out there as much?

And I know the answer…

Daily Ramblings, Shanghai Baby

I Have All The Time In The world

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all the time in the world
Photo courtesy of Crew – Unsplash

It’s been a busy week.

Everyone had a full week at school. I was in the office 4 days.  Hubby was off travelling. And all the kids after school activities kicked in. Plus we had a little Parent Teacher Conference tucked in there as well. And a trip to IKEA for some salmon.  (Yep, really, people round here go to IKEA to buy their salmon steaks…)

Now, I’m no Tiger Mom (largely because I’m British – and so I like the right vowel in the right place – thank you – what do Americans have against the letter ‘U”?) but if my kids wants to get physical after school and there is some way to do that without it just meaning a large scale fight in our house, I’m all up for it!  So, Kung Fu, Football, Swimming – I’m with you.

Add in a little technology club, ‘film studio’ and science lab time – and what you have is me wondering how on earth I’ll ever keep up this level of entertainment for my kids as the years go on.  The kids are 7 & 5. (School hasn’t yet started providing these such delights for the littlest pickle – she feels aggrieved!)  They are officially spoilt for choice at this wonderful school.  And I am thankful for the fact that we live 2 minutes away from the place.  Otherwise this schedule would not work.

A combination of these things got me thinking this week.

It felt a bit like when I was working full time.  It felt a little bit like I was rushing from here to there, and back again… always trying to beat the clock. LIke there wasn’t enough time.

I could feel it tightening across my shoulders and my chest. Rush, rush, rush. Don’t be late…

But actually there was.  There was exactly enough time for all of these brilliant things that the little ones wanted to do.  And enough time for the food and the water that needed to happen in between.

There was enough time for me to slow down just a bit.  To say hi to the new mum I didn’t know outside Film Club.  To wait for the queue on the swings so that the middlest could show me quite how high up in the air he can get himself these days. To watch and be proud as the biggest one finally masters doing her own shoelaces on her much loved football boots.

And I made a decision.  I decided that I was going to choose to think that I had enough time. I was going to give up on this continual notion of scarcity of time.  I was just going to do the thing that was happening right then, and then move on to the next one.

It’s hard. And it’s not my natural state, by a long shot.  But I am beginning to really understand, that the days may indeed feel long – but the years. They are really short.